EARLY SCHOOL HISTORY
So I have trawled back through my 'J' folder and compiled our timeframe. It's actually been quite good to look back and see how far we have come! It also evokes some not very pleasant memories
I will start Part 1 with a bit of history.
Part 1
So....as a baby J met all of her developmental goals when expected or earlier. She has always had favourite games, with her own set of rules, and has enjoyed playing them, repetitively.
She went to pre school at 2 and a half. She quickly developed a routine for drop off, but if for any reason that routine was impossible to fulfill on a particular day, she would become distressed and take longer to settle. Home life included many tantrums, which at the time we thought were just the "terrible twos". Little did we know ... !
After one term at her primary school, she started having problems entering the building. Often my husband had to accompany her to their sensory room, for anything up to an hour and a half, to help settle her, before she could join her class. It was unfortunate that the school heavily relied on my husband to come in to help calm her, as that set a precedent that if she kicked off, she knew daddy would arrive!
She went to pre school at 2 and a half. She quickly developed a routine for drop off, but if for any reason that routine was impossible to fulfill on a particular day, she would become distressed and take longer to settle. Home life included many tantrums, which at the time we thought were just the "terrible twos". Little did we know ... !
After one term at her primary school, she started having problems entering the building. Often my husband had to accompany her to their sensory room, for anything up to an hour and a half, to help settle her, before she could join her class. It was unfortunate that the school heavily relied on my husband to come in to help calm her, as that set a precedent that if she kicked off, she knew daddy would arrive!
Year One
During Year One problems escalated and hubby did the" Incredible Years" 12 week parenting course. During this time, J was actually excluded for two half days due to her violent outbursts.
At this time, the school made contact with another school, a specialist school, for help from their outreach support worker. They also started providing J with some SEN support and ELSA and a referral was put into Paediatrics in Feb 2017. As with all these things, as the wait was a long one, the situation seemed to gradually improve. At the appointment, the paediatrician detected no real problems with J, said she would keep us in the system for 6 months and that was that!
Year Two/Three
In Year Two J became slightly more settled, but the issues continued with entering the building. In fact I remember one occasion where the Pastoral Lead teacher who was in the corridor at the time sustained an injury from J! Albeit minor, it was an awful time for us, just wondering what would happen next.
From this point on we had a meeting with the school and point blank told them not to contact us anymore to go into school to help settle our daughter as it was just sending out the wrong signals!
Moving onto her new school and beginning of Year 3, aged 8. The first half term was surprisingly fine, but things changed rapidly after the autumn half term break. From November 2018 onwards, entering school once again became problematic
The school came up with many strategies to help, a year 5 friend on the door as a sort of meet and greet, a job to feed the school fish, entering by different doors, with different teachers. You name it, they pretty much tried it! We really can't fault the school for their efforts.
However, meltdowns increased with intensity, and her aggressive behaviour continued. She would attempt to escape the grounds, climb the school fence, and make her way off down the road, which inevitably resulted in her being 'assisted' to a safe room.
As a result of these escalations, she was on a reduced timetable of half days since January 2019! These half days consisted of 1:1 support, and minimal time in class!
Like all parents we just wished for J to have the ability to self regulate her emotions, and to begin enjoying her life without being overshadowed by her extreme anxiety, stress, and the repercussions they create.
From this point on we had a meeting with the school and point blank told them not to contact us anymore to go into school to help settle our daughter as it was just sending out the wrong signals!
Moving onto her new school and beginning of Year 3, aged 8. The first half term was surprisingly fine, but things changed rapidly after the autumn half term break. From November 2018 onwards, entering school once again became problematic
The school came up with many strategies to help, a year 5 friend on the door as a sort of meet and greet, a job to feed the school fish, entering by different doors, with different teachers. You name it, they pretty much tried it! We really can't fault the school for their efforts.
However, meltdowns increased with intensity, and her aggressive behaviour continued. She would attempt to escape the grounds, climb the school fence, and make her way off down the road, which inevitably resulted in her being 'assisted' to a safe room.
As a result of these escalations, she was on a reduced timetable of half days since January 2019! These half days consisted of 1:1 support, and minimal time in class!
Like all parents we just wished for J to have the ability to self regulate her emotions, and to begin enjoying her life without being overshadowed by her extreme anxiety, stress, and the repercussions they create.
These were difficult times indeed.
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