Earlier this year at our first Paediatric appointment, we were asked if J initiated any type of conversation, like pointing things out in the car, asking how our day was etc. To our absolute surprise we realised that she didn't do that and still doesn't now. It upsets me a bit to think we missed that, but it just was something we never realised until asked.
I remember one time she wanted to ring her friend, but when her friend answered, J had no idea what to say, it was painful to watch and I found myself prompting her with possible questions. However, once on a subject she loved, she talked non stop!
Challenges
Small talk sounds easy enough, but it can be a challenge for those who struggle with social communication. A two-way conversation can quickly end in awkward silence, embarrassment or can become totally one-sided. It might be a tad boring, but you will get far greater engagement by sticking to a topic your child loves.
I also find it better to never force the conversation in a direction you want it to go. At best you’ll get ignored; at worst, they’ll shut down or have an outburst.
To help J with this we started working with her and introducing ways to help her learn to instigate conversation and keep it flowing. We also asked her to observe other people and try to work out what that person might be interested in or how some people might be related or connected to one another.
Learning to make guesses about others helps in finding good topics of conversation.
We also went through possible conversation starters and the way communication works so she learns the 'etiquette' of allowing the other person to respond and how the conversation should flow naturally.
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